WHO KNEW?

 
I thought it was love...
Who knew that I was to be used like an appliance and tossed aside like garbage? 

 

I never thought that he was manipulating me to the point where I'd be too insecure to leave him.

He was the one. He was charming, gentle, loving, handsome, and most of all, he was great with my son. He would buy me things and he was there when I needed him.  He even helped my son with his schoolwork...

 

He was an amazing lover, by the way. He made my body sizzle! 

But in a very short amount of time, keeping up the facade became too much of a challenge for him. That's when the mask began to slip... 

From the beginning, his mannerisms were very difficult to interpret. It started with the "Silent Treatment". He would ignore me for hours or days and I couldn't figure out why. Each time time he'd give me the, "Silent Treatment", he was receiving another dose fuel because he knew he was getting under my skin. 

Then one day out of the blue, he'd say or do something super nice, without even acknowledging what happened. That's when I knew something was wrong. No apology - ever! No acknowledgment for his actions. And he would always shift the blame to me and make me feel guilty. And it WORKED! I gotta hand it to him; he was good at manipulation. He figured out how to make people love him and hate him at the same time. It was so confusing. That's what made it so hard to leave; his"nice" side. The type of "nice"  that every woman looks for in a man. And he knows that. That's why he uses this technique on his victims. 

Over time, I began to grow tense, angry and depressed. I didn't want to cook or clean anymore. I wasn't interested in sex, no matter how good it was. I was always on the defense. My body started to ache from the psychological trauma. I started drinking and smoking more cigarettes. I was losing weight because I couldn't eat. I lost my will to live. 

 

 

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© 2017-2019 by Gracie Phoenix

 

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